Category: Updates

I’ve always been someone who can see every side of a situation.  Maybe it’s the Gemini in me, maybe it’s because I grew up with two parents who came at situations from different sides, or maybe I’m just wired this way.  Either way, it’s served me well. 

As a mental health professional, as a business and life coach, and as a leader–this ability to see an issue from every possible angle has been crucial to my work.  No matter the situation, I can feel empathy and see possibilities. 

Of course, every strength has a shadow side–I can struggle with decision making because I see how any direction I turn there’s a possible solution.  

Many of you know by now that I’ve been diagnosed with cancer.

Throughout the process of diagnosis, surgery and treatment planning, I’ve noticed myself holding two seemingly opposite truths at the same time. 

I have this thing I do with my hands to remind myself that two things can be true at the same time.  I hold my arms out straight in front of me, my hands in fists, and I hold steady–reminding myself that it is ok to believe both truths at the same time.  That in fact, it’s one of those strange paradoxes of life. There are multiple (different) truths in any given situation. 

Here are the 2 truths that keep coming up for me:

I am in deep grief.  

I’m grieving my physical body never looking the same ever again.  

I’m grieving the loss of my health innocence.  I now know deep in my bones that so much of our health and our longevity is out of our control. I’m not saying there’s nothing we can do for our health; however, I also know that sometimes the spinning wheel arrow just lands on you no matter what you’ve done to try and control it.  

I’m grieving the loss of my youth.  I don’t mean getting wrinkles and gray hair.  I mean this process is aging me and due to having a hormone receptive cancer, I will be put into menopause well before what’s “typical”.

I’m grieving the loss of the self I knew. Cancer is now a part of my story and that will never go away.  Some things will never be the same as they were BC (before cancer) and that makes me so sad.

I could keep going–there are so many losses, so many things to mourn. Yet that is not the entire story, so let’s move on to the next truth…

I am in deep gratitude.  

I’m grateful for being grounded in steadiness, positivity and clarity. This isn’t toxic positivity, I assure you–the grief is there and it’s real. Yet as deep as I feel that grief down to my bones, I feel gratitude just as deeply. In some ways I’m realizing I’ve been preparing for this moment my entire life. This community I’ve built, the resilience I’ve had to cultivate, the deep sense of self I own–it’s what holding me steady and allowing me to feel positive and hopeful in the midst of so much uncertainty.  

I’m grateful for my family and my community.  The writer Anne Lamont says the three essential prayers are help, thanks and wow. I’m feeling that so deeply right now. My people have shown up for me in ways I never imagined. I am deeply loved and supported and that has never been more evident than this moment in time.  

I’m grateful for my intellect and resourcefulness.  This process is tricky and frustrating at times and frankly pretty difficult to navigate. I cannot imagine how hard it would be for someone without the resources I have.  

I’m grateful for the life and business I’ve set up for myself that’s allowing me to take the time off I need in order to move through this process.

I’m grateful for having every creature comfort imaginable to make this as comfortable and endurable as possible.  

I could go on–there are too many gratitudes to count. And what a wonderful, beautiful thing. 

Here’s what I hope you walk away with after reading this–We don’t have to BE just one thing or FEEL  just one thing.  We can be and feel lots of different things all at the same time.  One doesn’t diminish the other.  

Over the next many months, you may see me on a day that I can only access deep grief or on a day where deep gratitude is at the forefront–and that’s okay.  I believe in giving ourselves the grace to be more than one thing even when one threatens to take us over.  That moment will pass (it always does), and both things will become more accessible again. 

My truth in this journey is that grief and gratitude are always there, and they’re both necessary to support me in moving forward.

We recently returned from our annual retreat–this time it was in Isla Mujeres, Mexico, one of the most beautiful places in the world and a place that’s been incredibly meaningful and healing for me.

The connection and vulnerability we all shared has me processing a lot, and I’m sure that’s true for everyone who attended. 

Something that’s been coming up for me lately, and was reinforced in Mexico, is around the stories we all carry about leadership.

The first–and perhaps most fundamental story–is that we must be “in charge” of people to be a leader. We have this idea that if we don’t supervise people or take on some other traditional leadership role, we’re not really leaders.

In Dare to Lead, Brenè Brown says “I define a leader as anyone who takes responsibility for finding the potential in people and processes.” 

During our retreat, I identified leadership in every single participant and staff member. The ways we all lead are different–thankfully! No one needs the generic version of us.  Some of us are quiet leaders–when we speak, people know it means something and they listen. Some of us bring the energy to the room and lead by example. Some of us like to be front and center, and others like to support from the background.

What’s important is showing up as our truest, most authentic selves and leading from the heart. When we embrace who we are and get out of the comparison game, everything we do becomes more effective.

I’ve been a stay-at-home mom, worked traditional 8-5 jobs, and owned my own businesses. And I’ve always been a leader.

When we deny our innate ability and responsibility to be leaders in our own lives, we miss out on amazing opportunities for personal growth and connection with others. 

To deny that you’re a leader is often a desire to hide your true self and to avoid the (weighty) responsibility of being a good human in the world. That’s understandable–wouldn’t it be easier to believe that we don’t really affect others all that much? That if we hide in the background and keep ourselves small, we’ll stay safe?

Here’s the thing–you’re leading others all the time, whether you realize it or not. You don’t get a pass on leadership, because you’re a human in the world with connections and responsibilities. 

My challenge to you is to do leadership in a conscious way. Bring awareness to how you show up in the world. You’ll be amazed at the opportunities that come your way when you lead with intention! 

♥️, 

Jen

Okay, stay with us…

To imply that you can just “follow your passion” is a bit misleading. It’s not like it’s the elusive pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, and if you just follow the trail you’ll magically find it.

Instead, let’s talk about it this way–we need to find ways to cultivate our passions. To cultivate means to develop, to prepare for. 

So cultivating our passions is an active process, one that doesn’t ever stop. If you found what you were passionate about and felt like you were done–well, that would imply that Amy is still obsessed with Barbie, and believe us, this is not the case 😂

If we see finding our passions as being a process, then we remain open and curious to whatever we discover, and we leave room to evolve and change over time.

And because we like tangible steps here at Next Level Wealth, here’s a process you can use to cultivate YOUR passions 💫

1. Take care of your basic needs.
   You won’t have room to explore what you’re passionate about unless your basic needs are met. Nutrition, water, sleep, movement, safe and loving connections…those basic physical and mental health needs that are the essential foundation for reaching those higher level desires. Your car won’t drive unless it has gas (unless it’s electric, but you know what we mean). So fill up that tank!
   
   
2. Create space.
   Where’s that white space on your calendar, hmmm? If your entire day, every day, is filled with “to do’s”…how can you even figure out what you want to move towards, what lights you up? Passion requires SPACE, and it wants us to be creative and playful. Whether all you can manage is an hour or two at a time, or a solo weekend away, you need space to access passion.
   
   
3. Be curious.
   You never know what might light you up and inspire you. What would happen if you let go of your assumptions, of the stories you’ve always told yourself? We are all (yes, ALL) creative beings. Practice curiosity, explore new activities and ways of being, let go and HAVE FUN, with no other agenda! You’ll be amazed at what you learn about yourself and what you love.
   

Do you know what your passions are, in life and in business? 

♥️, 

Jen and Amy (PASSIONATE Business Coaches)

You used to feel it with your business–that fire, the passion and excitement, the motivation to achieve goals that once felt impossible. You were so pumped up about what you did that you talked to anyone who would listen, not to SELL to them but because you believed in it so deeply. And people were drawn to you like a magnet. 

Now you’re tired, bored and uninspired. You go through the motions, but your heart’s not in it. There are few, if any, deals on the table. You wonder, what’s the point? Maybe you’re in the wrong business. 

Does any of this sound familiar?

Before you get to the point where you throw it all away, let’s talk about burnout.

Burnout is caused by PROLONGED STRESS with LACK OF SELF CARE. 

And we’ve been there. It’s a terrible feeling and it distorts your view of everything. Many amazing profitable businesses have shut their doors due to burnout.

It’s important to catch what’s going on early enough to do something about it. Look for these signs if you’re wondering about burnout:
Unexplainable health issues
Sleep issues
Appetite and weight changes
Extreme exhaustion
Depression symptoms (irritability, apathy, difficulty concentrating, etc)
Feeling stuck and hopeless

Here’s the thing–you won’t get clarity about your business in a place of burnout. The burnout HAS to be addressed first. 

If you’re struggling with burnout, ask yourself these questions:

1. Are there ways to reduce the stressors?
   Often we’re doing more than we need to with tasks that either aren’t that important or that someone else could be doing. Focus your energy on the tasks that produce the highest return on your investment of time and energy, and let go of the rest. 
   
   
2. Can you have healthier boundaries? Do you allow yourself to say “no” even if it makes you uncomfortable and disappoints someone?
   A lack of healthy boundaries is a recipe for burnout. Have you ever seen a lifeguard head out into the ocean to rescue a drowning person? You know what they always, ALWAYS bring? A good flotation device. It doesn’t do any good to attempt to save someone else’s if you’re not well resourced yourself.
   
   
3. Are you spending time doing things you love and are passionate about? Are you prioritizing yourself? Have you told yourself a story about how “I don’t have time,” “I’m too busy,” “Everything will fall apart if I take time off?”
   Hard truth: if your business is set up in such a way that you can’t take time for yourself, then your business needs to fail–or it needs to get a DRAMATIC makeover. A key factor in making a business sustainable over the long term is a culture where self care is encouraged and prioritized.
   
   
4. What support do you need that you don’t currently have in place?
   Examples of support could be therapy, coaching, mentorship, a consultant, hiring the right people (which might mean letting go of others), time off…to name a few!
   And ASK FOR HELP if you need it. Put your ego aside and reach out.
   

Let’s get you back to a place of passion, creativity and inspiration! If you address the burnout and you still aren’t satisfied with your business, then okay–maybe it’s time to let it go. Nine times out of ten, that won’t be the case. 

The vast majority of the time, you can fall back in love with your business! And if we can support you in getting there, let us know ✨

♥️, 
Jen and Amy

A big theme we hear about from clients all the time is the struggle with implementing goals. The actual DOING versus the part that, frankly, is more fun…visioning and planning!

Taking action is incredibly important when it comes to goals, and yet it’s often the part that we struggle with the most. 

There’s a Zen proverb that comes to mind when we think of this stage of goal planning: “Before enlightenment; chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment; chop wood, carry water.”

Remember that 80’s movie The Karate Kid?  When Daniel asks Mr. Miyagi to teach him karate, Miyagi has him waxing cars and buffing floors in very particular ways.  Daniel, of course, gets incredibly frustrated and feels like Miyagi is just using him to do all of his chores.  Later on Daniel realizes Miyagi was helping him build a strong foundation for becoming highly skilled in karate. Miyagi had Daniel work with his resistance, push through the feelings of boredom and frustration, and create action that was so frequently practiced it became habit.  

Chop wood, carry water.  Wax on, wax off.

Two major factors came into play with Daniel and Mr. Miyagi.  It was a combination of 100% commitment to the goal AND the right accountability that allowed Daniel to take action and succeed.  Even when the action was super repetitive and annoying, even when he was exhausted and frustrated.  Daniel was deeply committed to learning karate, and he sought out accountability from someone who knew what they were talking about and pushed him to achieve more than he dreamed possible.

So we’ve got two questions for you this week:

Are you 100% committed to your goals?

Who or what is holding you accountable?

Be a Daniel. Go find your Mr. Miyagi. 

And if nothing else, we hope if you– for some wild reason– have never seen The Karate Kid, you’re resolving that issue right away!

We are SO very excited to be launching this gorgeous website for all of you!  

If you’ve found this section, you know we’re also starting a blog.  And why is that, you ask?  Great question–the goal of this blog is to offer YOU, our community, tons of tips, strategies and support for creating the life and the business you want.  

If you’re already a part of our NLW community, thank you for checking out the new website!  For any new folks, poke around our site to see what we’re all about, and sign up to receive our free newsletter so you’ll be the first to know the latest NLW happenings.

Stay tuned for more blog posts and announcements.  We’ve been cooking up some fantastic offerings and we want our community to be the first to know.  Big things are happening at Next Level Wealth…welcome to the journey, friends!

Love,
Jen and the NLW Team